Hammering it Out: Week 13 Predictions

Obviously, these predictions will miss the Thursday night game. Raise your hand if you would have predicted the Seahawks to blow out the Eagles? You're a liar. To the predictions! Atlanta Falcons at Houston Texans (+2.5) This game has huge Playoff implications for both teams, moreso for the Falcons. If the Falcons lose and Detroit wins, they should slip out of the Wild Card spot they slid into last week. If Houston loses and either Baltimore or New England win, Houston falls out of the #1 AFC seed as far down as the #3. I could really go either way here. Obviously, I think Atlanta needs the win and without Matt Schaub, the Falcons just need to force turnovers and limit their own, shut down the run and sustain long drives. THAT'S ALL. You know, the same thing I say every week concerning every game. -Jared Jared - Falcons win by 3 or more Travis - Texans by 3 or more Tennessee Titans at Buffalo Bills (-1.5) This game is hard to call for me, as I feel like the season is over for both of these teams. You have to figure Buffalo is going to be harder to beat at home given their 4-1 record. Chris Johnson had his way (finally) with a soft run defense last week and could see that carry over to this game. Who knows? -Jared Jared - Bills win by 2 or more Travis - Bills by 2 or more Kansas City Chiefs at Chicago Bears (-8.5) I'm not sure who's worse, Tyler Palko or Caleb Hanie. Hmm. I wonder when in the world I would ever find out the answer to that question. Sunday it is. The Bears should limit Kansas City's offensive contributions and if Matt Forte doesn't get the ball 30 or more times, I will wonder why heads aren't rolling in Chicago. -Jared Jared - Bears win by 9 or more Travis - chiefs lose by less than 9, win, or tie Cincinnati Bengals at Pittsburgh Steelers (-7.5) The Bengals struggled against a couple of the big dogs in the AFC in November and rookie phenom A.J. Green missed a little bit of time with an injury. The last time these two teams faced each other, the Steelers won by a touchdown. I expect, as should any real NFL fan, that the second time is the charm. -Jared Jared -Bengals lose by 7 or less, tie, or win Travis - Steelers win by 8 or more Denver Broncos at Minnesota Vikings (-1.5) How dare Vegas put odds against Tim Tebow! Football Jesus is 5-1 as a starter and has an inspired defense to back him up. The Vikings cut Donovan McNabb this week and Adrian Peterson is out with an injury, leaving Percy Harvin and rookie quarterback Christian Ponder to put points on the board. Give me Broncos all day. -Jared Jared - Broncos lose by 1 or less, tie, or win Travis - Vikings win by 2 or more Indianapolis Colts at New England Patriots (-20.5) Frankly, the line looks about right for this contest. Tom Brady had one hell of a November and the Colts are just sputtering along as a team. I can see the Colts putting some points on the board against a defense that's almost as bad as their own. I'm not sure how many, given that Curtis Painter was benched in favor of Dan Orlovsky, who hasn't won a game since 2004. Look it up. -Jared Jared - Colts lose by 20 or less, tie, or  win Travis - Pats win by 21 or more Oakland Raiders at Miami Dolphins (-2.5) Let me get this straight. Miami has been thrashed repeatedly all season. Oakland, who is winning their Division and is 4-1 on the road, is an underdog? Who makes these lines? -Jared Jared - Raiders lose by 2 or less, tie, or win Travis - Raiders  win, tie, or lose by less than 3 New York Jets at Washington Redskins (+3.5) Rex Ryan's Flying Abominations have all but taken themselves out of the Playoff race and Washington finds interesting ways to lose almost every week. Who knows what happens here? I blame Dan Snyder and the Shanahans. -Jared Jared - Jets win by 4 or more Travis - Jets win by 4 or more Carolina Panthers at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-1.5) There should be some chemistry building in Carolina, right? Tampa Bay is .500 at home and appears bound for an 8-8 season. The crazy thing about the NFL is that there is no such thing as momentum. Each week presents new challenges and opportunities. Philosophical, eh? I have a feeling these two teams are battling it out to see who the bottom of that torrid NFC South's barrel is. Viva la Carolina! Or something. -Jared Jared - Panthers lose by 1 or less, tie. or win Travis - Panthers win, tie, or lose by less than 2 Baltimore Ravens at Cleveland Browns (+6.5) Cleveland may be seeing spirited defensive play, but the Ravens are a top team in the league. Right? I mean, John Harbaugh should know by now that the more Ray Rice touches the ball, the better. Right? Oh, right. Nevermind. Special teams makes the difference in this game. -Jared Jared - Ravens win by 7 or more Travis - Ravens win by 7 or more Dallas Cowboys at Arizona Cardinals (+6.5) The good news for the Cowboys is that Miles Austin might make it back next week. This week? Come on. It's the Cardinals. Right? I dunno. Ask St. Louis. -Jared Jared - Cowboys win by 7 or more Travis - Cowboys win by 7 or more Green Bay Packers at New York Giants (+6.5) Really? The Giants get absolutely rocked by the Saints last week and all Green Bay gets is a touchdown? Who makes these lines up? If Aaron Rodgers isn't on your MVP ballot and you're a legit sportswriter, you should find a different hobby/job/waste of time at work. Packers by a whole bunch. -Jared Jared - Packers win by 7 or more Travis - Packers win by 7 or more St. Louis Rams at San Francisco 49ers (-13.5) With what appears to be a healthy Frank Gore and a nasty defense, there isn't a whole lot of promise for St. Louis this week. The good news for the Rams? Five more games until you get a top 5 draft pick! Christmas time! -Jared Jared - 49ers by 14 or more Travis - Rams win, tie, or lose by less than 14 Detroit Lions at New Orleans Saints (-6.5) Another game where I don't understand the line. The Lions are without premier defensive lineman Ndamokung Suh and Matt Stafford has a banged up finger, not to mention the cross-country flight to the Big Easy. New Orleans doesn't lose at home and just crushed the New York Giants. There isn't a lot of hope for Detroit in this game. Mercy rule, maybe? -Jared Jared - Saints win by 7 or more Travis - Saints win by 7 or more San Diego Chargers at Jacksonville Jaguars (+2.5) This should be by far the most sloppy Monday night game all year. Jacksonville just fired Jack Del Rio and I'm sure Norv Turner's seat is getting warm (or headset. Whatever.). Philip Rivers is giving the ball away for San Diego and Jacksonville's only shot at action centers around Maurice Jones-Drew. I want to call an upset here, mostly because I think Chargers nation is ready for a regime change and anytime you lose to a rookie quarterback/interim head coach, you're next on the chopping block, right? -Jared Jared - Chargers win (sloppily, I might add. Again.) by 3 or more Travis - Chargers win by 3 or more